If the Shoe Fits

The co-workers have already discovered I have a shoe fetish, so I've been trying to do a parade of shoes for them lately, so they can see all the collection has to offer. But I've set the expectations too high, so they were disappointed when I came in wearing a pair of basic black heels today. Apparently I'm only supposed to wear outrageous shoes from now on.

So I was pondering all my shoes in the car today, and since I did it with my glassware, I am now compelled to inventory my shoes on my blog. After all, the first step it to admit that you've got a problem:

(in no particular order)
1. Red Patent Leather Donald J. Pliner loafers
2. Black Clarks clogs
3. Brown loafers
4. Purple Doc Marten combat boots (8 hole)
5. Lime green Old Navy flip flops (with a hot pink pattern on them)
6. Mint Green Converse Chuck Taylor low-tops
7. Tan Suede Converse Jack Purcells
8. Patchwork (blue, green, and maroon) Converse Chuck Taylor high tops
9. Black Payless Shoe Source black heels (there's some lycra in there, they're actually very comfortable)
10. Purple Suede Hush Puppy Mules
11. Olive Green Corduroy Old Navy ballet flats
12. Olive green with black cowprint, fuzzy ankle boots (I THINK Franco Sarto, but I could be wrong)
13. Pink Suede Anne Klein Loafers
14. Maroon Suede low-heel loafers
15. Black leather low-heel loafers
16. Maroon leather, with a floral stitched design, Franco Sarto high-heel mules
17. Tan leather Franco Sarto high-heel mules
18. Silver suede strappy sandals
19. Black Dansko sandals
20. Brown Stephen Madden high-heel sandals
21. Olive Green Nike hiking boots
22. Blue Tevas
23. Maroon Birkenstocks
24. Tan Saltwater Sandals
25. Black Nine West heels, with a funky, curvy heel
26. Nude suede Nine West heels
27. Brown high-heel ankle boots
28. Rope sandals (where all the strappy parts are made of rope, or something that looks like rope)
29. Primary Color (Blue, Red and Yellow) elastic, super-strappy, flat sandals
30. New Balance cross-trainers
31. Really old cross trainers for mucking about
32. Asian velour ballet slippers, with a floral pattern on the toes
33. Red Old Navy slippers
34. White Doc Marten Brogues (aka the Mafia Golf Shoes) (that desperately need to be polished)
35. Turquoise flip-flops
36. Blue beaded flip-flops
37. Ugly brown loafers, that I could probably give to Goodwill and never miss

I was able to name the first 34 pairs without getting up from the couch. The final three pairs I basically never wear. The loafers were cute and comfortable once upon a time, but not so much anymore. And there was one summer I had a flip-flop fetish, as I had convinced myself that eventually I would find a pair that was both comfortable AND cute, but that never panned out.

The one pair of shoes I miss most are the pair that officially began the fetish. They were maroon (apparently I have a thing for maroon shoes), velvet sneakers by Tommy Hilfiger, but looked very similar to a Chuck Taylor with the white toe. They got worn out, so I had to get rid of them. I still miss them.

I just drown my sorrows with more shoes.