Contract Bitch

As I surf my way through the blogosphere I am encouraged by the number of people who are reacting to the Shiavo case by creating a living will (or similar documentation) to help ensure their wishes are met when they can no longer voice their opinion.

However, I have this feeling that a lot of people are filling out this piece of paper and filing it away somewhere, thinking that covers them.

Let me make this perfectly clear: I am not a lawyer. I do not play one on TV. I have taken the LSATs, I have worked for a law school, I have had many people tell me I should pursue the law, but I have no formal legal education (unless you count the Saturday I spent at U of O with other folks they were trying to recruit to attend law school). I am not offering legal advice, I am offering my opinion.

However, from past experience I know how volatile contracts can be. I've had a position in the past where I helped draft contracts as part of my position. I earned the nickname "contract bitch" because my salesmen would come to me with information like "we'll give them a bunch of good stuff" and I'd make them quantify it for me. Salesmen don't like having to quantify benefits. In that position I was amazed by some of the negotiations. Lawyers on both sides getting involved over a single one syllable word.

Contracts are open to interpretation. Legal wills, powers of attorney, whatever document it is you have prepared is, essentially, a type of contract. And it could be open to interpretation. So you'd best hope those who are interpreting it for you are interpreting it to your liking.

These are the situations where I am thankful that I come from such a bizarre family. I have a half-brother who is 20 years older than me (so, basically old enough to be my father) who I have always known about. However, according to legal records I also have a half-sister. It is biologically impossible for her to be my father's daughter (since my dad was in the military at the time and nowhere near where the mother was), but because my father was married to the mother at the time it is his name on the birth certificate. I wouldn't know this were it not for the fact that when my parents re-wrote their will when I was in high school they mentioned it to us. They have specifically written her out of the will because otherwise she could, theoretically, come out of the woodwork and try to claim a piece of my dad's estate. My parents brought this bit of my dad's past up so we wouldn't go read the will someday and wonder what the hell was going on when he's mentioning this woman we've never heard of before.

It's the discussions that are important. Making sure your family and loved ones know what you've got in terms of documents, what you intend, what skeletons might be in the closet to contend with you don't know about.

My parents and I have discussed their will and what it contains. I've actually made requests of them to guarantee that there are no doubts as to their intentions. I'm glad they have the paper, but I'm even more thankful we've had these talks. Because a piece of paper is not enough.

So go fill out the papers. Absolutely get those legal protections in place. But don't think that prevents you from having to have "the talk" with your loved ones. Really, its easier than those uncomfortable talks you had with Mom when you were no longer a girl but now have become a woman (or whatever the male equivalent talk is).

Now onto happier things.